Thursday, April 17, 2014
YOLO COUNTY NEWS
99 CENTS

Here comes trouble …

AnniesMailbox

Dear Annie: We belong to a dinner group with six married couples. One of the couples divorced after the husband caught his wife having an affair. He no longer comes to the dinner parties, but the ex-wife still shows up and brings her new (married) boyfriend. They have been together for three years.

Here’s the bigger problem: She flirts with my husband at every social activity. She always gives him a hug when we run into her. He is always pleasant and chats, when I’d rather he was less chummy. One time, on New Year’s Eve, I saw my husband put his arm around her waist as she moved to the music with another man. I watched (humiliated) as the three of them swayed back and forth.

I assume it was the alcohol that prompted him to do this. However, it apparently fueled her fire. At one dinner party, she leaned across the table toward me and made a comment about my husband’s “size.” I kept my cool and replied that it wasn’t her business, but my husband, who was sitting right next to me, said nothing.

At the dinners, we act like friends, but I am sorely tempted to give her a piece of my mind. My husband is getting aggravated with me. He claims he’s never cheated on me and she’s never touched him inappropriately. He says, “What am I supposed to do?” I asked him to delete her cell number, but he has not done that. This woman is not my friend, and I think she’s crossed a line. Any suggestions?

— Had Enough

Dear Enough: As always in such cases, the problem is less about the woman and more about your husband’s reaction. He allows her flirting and even encourages her, and then becomes annoyed with you for doubting him. It undermines your trust. There is no reason for him to have her phone number in his contact list. Ask him to delete it while you are watching. Then tell him all of his future responses to this woman’s inappropriate remarks should make it clear to her that he is not interested. If he refuses, the next step is counseling.

————

Dear Annie: I have noticed that whenever there is a tragedy involving the death of a child, people place stuffed animals and dolls at the scene. Please, in memory of these children, tell readers to donate the toys and dolls to the local police or fire departments, hospitals or a cancer center where they will bring comfort to living children.

— Pennsylvania

Dear Pennsylvania: That’s a lovely idea, and we hope people will consider it, although not everyone will want to. There is some sentiment attached to marking the actual spot where a tragedy occurred. We understand why loved ones might object to having these tributes removed, but in many instances, they are a safety hazard. Also, stuffed animals that have been left out in the rain and mud are no longer in any condition to donate.

The handling of these roadside memorials belongs to the local municipality. Many allow toys, dolls, etc., to stay for a specified period of time, and then the department of transportation removes them. In some areas, temporary memorials are replaced with a single permanent marker. The state of Delaware bans roadside memorials altogether and has instead provided the Delaware Highway Memorial Garden as a tribute. You should inquire with your local department of transportation and suggest the objects be donated.

————

Dear Annie: I read the letter from “Worried Wife,” whose 44-year-old husband drinks too much and refuses to see a doctor or dentist. In addition to the advice that you gave her to contact Al-Anon and make sure he has a valid will and that his affairs are in order, she also should make sure he has a lot of insurance. She will need it to raise their four children alone.

— K.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

Special to The Enterprise

LEAVE A COMMENT

Discussion | No comments

The Davis Enterprise does not necessarily condone the comments here, nor does it review every post. Read our full policy

  • Recent Posts

  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this newspaper and receive notifications of new articles by email.

  • .

    News

     
    Davis wins USA Today Best Cycling Town honor

    By Dave Ryan | From Page: A1

     
    Benefit set to help local bike legend

    By Adrian Glass-Moore | From Page: A1 | Gallery

    Jury deliberates murder, elder-abuse charges

    By Lauren Keene | From Page: A1

     
    State’s health care sign-ups beat projections

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2, 1 Comment

    For the record

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A2

     
    California residents divided on drought solution

    By San Francisco Chronicle | From Page: A2

     
    For the record

    By Dave Ryan | From Page: A2

    Three killed in attack on Ukrainian base

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2 | Gallery

     
    Downtown post office set to reopen

    By Thomas Oide | From Page: B3

    Run or walk to prevent child abuse in Yolo County

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B3 | Gallery

     
    Nominations sought for charity paint giveaway

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B3

     
    Scholar will discuss human trafficking in Friday talk

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

    Per Capita Davis: Now, for some good news

    By John Mott-Smith | From Page: A4

     
    Birch Lane hosts 50th anniversary party

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

    Hannah Stein reads poetry at gallery

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

     
    Davis Food Co-op to offer free bags on Earth Day

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

    Get in the picture with school board candidate

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

     
    KDVS hosts on-air fundraiser April 21-27

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

    Tickets on sale for Pence Garden Tour

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

     
    Fundraiser planned for Allen’s campaign

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4, 3 Comments

    Food Co-op board plans open house

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

     
    Davis Downtown hosts candidate forum

    By Dave Ryan | From Page: A4

    Learn more about Google Glass at talk

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

     
    Barbecue celebrates winter shelter program

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A5

    Sign of things to come

    By Fred Gladdis | From Page: A8

     
    Davis Soroptimists celebrate 60 years

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A8

    .

    Forum

    Fancy meeting you here …

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: B5

     
    Tom Meyer cartoon

    By Debbie Davis | From Page: A6

    Don’t miss a Trokanski dance

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A6

     
    Frank Bruni: The oldest hatred, forever young

    By New York Times News Service | From Page: A6, 4 Comments

    Expert: Free parking is a myth

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A6, 1 Comment

     
    Have they really learned?

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A6

    A great community effort

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A6, 2 Comments

     
    Public Health Heroes honored

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A6

    .

    Sports

    Landry evolves into UCD women’s lacrosse leader

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    Huge inning propels Pleasant Grove past DHS

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B1

    Giants edge Dodgers

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    Foster steps down as Lady Blue Devil basketball coach

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1 | Gallery

    River Cats’ streak reaches six wins

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B1

     
    Youth roundup: Martinez, Chan come up big at gymnastics regional

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B2 | Gallery

    Kings drop season finale to Suns

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

     
    Angels get past A’s in extras

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B8 | Gallery

    .

    Features

    .

    Arts

    Wineaux: Good deals off the beaten path

    By Susan Leonardi | From Page: A7

     
    Rockabilly phenom to play at The Palms

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

    HellaCappella showcases a cappella singing

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

     
    ‘One’ singular sensation to open at DMTC

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

    25th annual state clay competition exhibit at The Artery

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

     
    .

    Business

    .

    Obituaries

    Tapan Munroe

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

     
    .

    Comics

    Comics: Thursday, April 17, 2014

    By Creator | From Page: B6