Sunday, September 21, 2014
YOLO COUNTY NEWS
99 CENTS

Also, he’s an astronaut … and a senator

AnniesMailbox

By
From page B5 | November 06, 2012 |

Dear Annie: My boyfriend lives with a woman who gave birth to his child. He says it is not a romantic arrangement. She wanted to get pregnant, and he provided the genetic material. He sleeps on the sofa.

My issue is, when he wants to spend time with this kid, the mother must always be present. She also isn’t aware that he is dating me, and we’ve been together for two years. He is divorced, and his ex-wife and other children don’t know about this child. He expects me to keep his secret, stay away from the birth mother and be fine with all of this — even when overnight trips are planned.

I will never be fine with this. He says I should trust him. But, Annie, I just can’t wrap my head around why I should blindly accept this. Am I wrong?

— Third Wheel

Dear Third: Your boyfriend is juggling three separate lives: one with you, one with his ex-wife and children, and another with his “secret” child and the biological mother. We can think of no good reason for this man to be living with another woman unless he has made a commitment to her in addition to his child. He can support the child emotionally and financially without sleeping on her sofa.

It is not your place to inform his ex-wife or his other children about his arrangement. However, we think he is having a romantic relationship with the woman he lives with, and you are his sideline. What you do about that is up to you.

————

Dear Annie: I am 17 years old, and I have a younger sister who is 13. Her attitude is awful. I have to drive her to school every day, and we always get into fights. She constantly criticizes my driving and puts me down. She also calls me a lot of names and says hurtful things. We even got into a physical fight.

I’ve told my parents that she is rude and I am not inclined to do anything for her. But my parents won’t get involved. They never punish her, and she gets away with everything. In fact, they just bought her a new computer.

I don’t know what to do anymore. I can’t wait until I leave for college and won’t have to deal with her. Is that wrong? What should I do?

— Frustrated Sister

Dear Frustrated: We understand that your little sister is driving you nuts. This is not uncommon with younger siblings. We suggest you be the adult. Don’t let her ruffle you. Ignore her barbs and criticisms, which are intended to provoke a response and get your attention. When you need to vent, talk to your school counselor, best friend, favorite teacher or a sympathetic relative. But please remember that when your sister outgrows this immature stage, she could become your closest friend. Hang in there.

————

Dear Annie: This is in response to “Joe’s Buddies for Life,” whose 50-year-old friend is still trying to realize a dream.

I spent my career as a high school guidance counselor. Many times, kids would have plans to play sports in college as a means of paying for their degree. My advice to them was to go to the coach for an honest assessment of their skills.

”Joe” needs to do the same thing. He needs to find someone who can give him a true assessment of his talents in his chosen field. He may need some moral support to face this evaluation. He will not be at all agreeable to considering another career until he faces the reality of his chances for success in his dream career.

— That First Step Is a Hard One

————

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

— Creators Syndicate Inc.

Comments

comments

Special to The Enterprise

  • Recent Posts

  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this newspaper and receive notifications of new articles by email.

  • .

    News

    Elementary school counselors: necessary, but poorly funded

    By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A1 | Gallery

     
     
    Bet Haverim hosts High Holy Day services

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A1

     
    Teams assess damage as wildfire burns

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2 | Gallery

     
    Driver arrested for DUI after Saturday morning crash

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A2

    Help raise funds for juvenile diabetes cure

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Jewelry, art for sale at Senior Center

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

    Davis Community Meals needs cooks

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Hawk Hill trip planned Sept. 30

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

     
    UC campus chancellors granted hefty pay raises

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

    Send kids to camp!

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

     
    Da Vinci awarded $38,000 for restorative justice program

    By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A4

    Outdoor yoga marathon celebrates community

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A5

     
    Wise words

    By Sue Cockrell | From Page: A12

     
    .

    Forum

    Awareness is key to this fight

    By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

     
    Where is this going?

    By Creators Syndicate | From Page: A6

    We’re living in the Golden State of emergency

    By Debra DeAngelo | From Page: A6

     
    Options for protection come with flu season

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A6

    Are we there yet? Not enough hours in the day to goof off

    By Tanya Perez | From Page: A6Comments are off for this post

     
    Don’t sell city greenbelt

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

    Paso Fino project is flawed

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

     
    Paso Fino — it’s not worth it

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

    Archer will get my vote

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

     
    It’s time for Davis Scouts to stand up for what is right

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A10

    Mike Keefe cartoon

    By Debbie Davis | From Page: A10

     
    Building something at schools’ HQ

    By Our View | From Page: A10

    Speak out

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A11

     
    Maybe David can beat Goliath again

    By Lynne Nittler | From Page: A11 | Gallery

    .

    Sports

    DHS gets on its Morse to beat Edison

    By Thomas Oide | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    JV Blue Devils drop low-scoring affair

    By Spencer Ault | From Page: B2

     
    Republic FC’s fairy tale season continues

    By Evan Ream | From Page: B3 | Gallery

    Wire briefs: Giants rally falls short in San Diego

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

     
    Four local swimmers qualify for Olympic Trials

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B3

    ‘We’re a way better team’ than record, says UCD’s Shaffer

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B4 | Gallery

     
    UCD roundup: Aggie men pound Pomona-Pitzer in the pool

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B4

    Davis 15-year-old making a splash in European F4 series

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B8 | Gallery

     
    .

    Features

    .

    Arts

    ‘Ladies Foursome’ adds shows

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    .

    Business

    UCD grad’s startup earns kudos at TechCrunch event

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A7

     
    Styles on target for November debut

    By Wendy Weitzel | From Page: A7

    MBI hires VP of marketing

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

     
    Taylor Morrison unveils new Woodland community next weekend

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A9 | Gallery

    Rob White: What is an ‘innovation center’?

    By Rob White | From Page: A9

     
    .

    Obituaries

    Carol L. Walsh

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

     
    .

    Comics

    Comics: Sunday, September 21, 2014

    By Creator | From Page: B8