Sunday, December 21, 2014
YOLO COUNTY NEWS
99 CENTS

Feeling lonely in the country

AnniesMailbox

By
From page B5 | July 03, 2014 |

Dear Annie: I am a 76-year-old man. After 46 years of a happy marriage, my precious wife passed away four years ago.

I live in the country and have become acquainted with several single women around my age who are widows or divorcees and live within a 20-mile radius. I have taken a few of them out to dinner or to a play. They go with me once or twice and won’t go again. They tell me they are too busy with their grandchildren. One said, “We are too different.” Another said she is not in the dating mood. All have told me that I am a real nice guy, and it’s not because of anything I did or said.

I’ve never made inappropriate advances toward these women. I’ve only asked for a little hug because I miss holding my wife. But it seems they do not want to be touched, and two of them told me that I am expecting too much. I have never indicated that I wanted more than a hug, although I have to admit, in my own mind, I have hoped that after going out a few times, we could go a little farther than that. I’m not looking for a serious relationship. I am just extremely lonesome and would like to have a companion to go places with and be together occasionally.

I’ve never really understood women, so I’m at a loss here. I don’t own a computer, so I cannot try meeting women online. Do you have any suggestions? Please tell me what I’m doing wrong.

— Lonesome Okie

Dear Lonesome: We don’t know what you are doing wrong. If you are giving these women the impression that you want physical affection, but not a serious relationship, they may not be interested. Asking for hugs on a first date may be too forward, or it may frighten them. We know you are lonely, but please slow down. You might be coming across as too needy, which is not attractive. Get to know these women as friends first, and see where it leads. And if you are interested in online dating, your local library can provide a computer.

————

Dear Annie: My brother’s daughter is getting married this summer. She’s having a huge wedding. All of the nieces, nephews and cousins are invited except our three daughters. My brother said they have to cut somewhere.

Should I just shrug this off? I told my mother that I’m so upset, I’m thinking of never seeing or speaking to my brother again. Is this a feeling I should be having? Should I ask my brother what we did to them that they would exclude us in this way?

— Not a Happy Sister

Dear Sister: Generally, it is wise to “cut” along the same family lines, so that, for example, you invite all first cousins or none of them. However, sometimes the bride or groom has a close relationship with some cousins and not others. In such cases, if the guest list is limited, it makes sense to invite those with whom you are closest. Is it possible that your children are especially distant from the bride? Have they had a falling out of which you are unaware? Unless there is a reason, we find this exclusion unnecessarily hurtful. We hope you can work through it.

————

Dear Annie: “Disgusted in N.Y.” said her 85-year-old aunt never had a bath in the six weeks she spent in the hospital. There is evidence not to bathe hospital patients using plastic tubs due to increased infection rates when tubs are not disinfected sufficiently between uses.

As a result, many hospitals have adopted the use of prepackaged disposable bath wipes. Often these are warmed and feel good to the patient, and it cleans them. Perhaps the hospital needs to investigate using these wipes.

— Pennsylvania Nurse

————

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

— Creators Syndicate Inc.

Comments

comments

Creators Syndicate

  • Recent Posts

  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this newspaper and receive notifications of new articles by email.

  • .

    News

    No-nonsense Musser voted Citizen of the Year

    By Dave Ryan | From Page: A1 | Gallery

     
    Sharing a meal, and so much more

    By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A1 | Gallery

    Brinley Plaque honors environmental stalwart

    By Dave Ryan | From Page: A1 | Gallery

     
    What’s new at UCD? Construction projects abound

    By Tanya Perez | From Page: A1 | Gallery

     
    Downtown crash results in DUI arrest

    By Lauren Keene | From Page: A2

    March trial date set in Davis molest case

    By Lauren Keene | From Page: A2

     
    North Korea proposes joint probe over Sony hacking

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

     
    AP sources: Cops’ killer angry over Garner death

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

    Raul Castro: Don’t expect detente to change Cuban system

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

     
    Police seek help in finding runaway twin girls

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A2

    Pedal around Davis on weekly bike ride

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Supplies collected for victims of abuse

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Donors, volunteers honored on Philanthropy Day

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3 | Gallery

    Enterprise plans Christmas, New Year’s holiday hours

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
     
    Luminaria display planned in West Davis

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

    Soup’s On will benefit NAMI-Yolo

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Surprise honor is really nice, dude

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A5 | Gallery

     
    Konditorei presents free holiday concert

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A5

    .

    Forum

    It’s not a pretty picture

    By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B4

     
    Google me this: Should I hit that button?

    By Marion Franck | From Page: B4

     
    E-cigs surpass regular cigarettes among teens

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B4

    Too late to pick a fight

    By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

     
    Tom Meyer cartoon

    By Debbie Davis | From Page: A10

     
    All police need to humanize

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

    Are we only a fair-weather bike city?

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

     
    Join us in making our world more just

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A10

    The electronic equivalent of war

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A11

     
    The Green House effect: Homes where the elderly thrive

    By New York Times News Service | From Page: A11

    .

    Sports

    Stenz shines as DHS girls take a tournament title

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    Aggie Manzanares not quite finished carrying the rock

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1 | Gallery

    UCD women look to improve, despite game at No. 7 Stanford

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    Second-half run spurs Aggie men to 8-1

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B1

     
    49ers fall to San Diego in overtime

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B10

    .

    Features

    .

    Arts

    .

    Business

    Sierra Northern Railway names CEO

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

     
    Sink your teeth into Vampire Penguin

    By Wendy Weitzel | From Page: A4 | Gallery

    Marrone Bio expands its product reach in Latin America

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

     
    .

    Obituaries

    .

    Comics

    Comics: Sunday, December 21, 2014

    By Creator | From Page: B8