Friday, January 30, 2015
YOLO COUNTY NEWS
99 CENTS

He feels betrayed by parents

AnniesMailbox

By
From page B5 | October 13, 2013 |

Dear Annie: I am a 36-year-old man. I was in an accident 25 years ago and suffered a mild traumatic brain injury. It was tough growing up. When I was 23, I moved out on my own. This is when the real trouble began. First, I started drinking, and then I abused my medication. In 2002, I wrecked my car while driving intoxicated. The judge told me to go to a brain injury rehab and get my life back in order. I started my first one six months later. I am in my fourth one right now.

My parents became my legal guardians without discussing it with me. After the accident, I received money from a settlement and was assured by the attorney that no one could touch it without my approval. Yet my parents have gone through that money without any input from me. They used it to get their house ready to sell and promised to reimburse me. They sold the place a year ago, and now they have the nerve to say that I gave them the money as a “gift.” I did no such thing. What now?

— J.D.

Dear J.D.: You need to talk to a lawyer. Your parents undoubtedly requested guardianship in order to protect you at a time when you were going through some difficulties. And it’s also possible they expended a great deal of money on your care and rehab and felt that taking the settlement money was somehow justified. The judge who issued the guardianship can be asked to remove it. But in order to get the money back from your parents, you might have to sue them.

————

Dear Annie: I recently lost my wife after many years together. It was an amazing marriage, and I miss her immensely.

I am looking to find a companion. The problem is, my daughter is not in my corner on this issue. How can I reason with her that it’s my life and dating or even marrying again is not being disrespectful to my late wife’s memory?

— Lonely Widower

Dear Widower: How long ago is “recently”? While your dating life is not your daughter’s business, we can understand her concern if your wife died less than six months ago. She may worry that you will rush into an inappropriate or abusive relationship out of loneliness, so please be cautious. Regardless, this is your decision. Please talk to your daughter and assure her that no one will take her mother’s place in your heart, but you miss the companionship and warmth that another person can provide. Explain that it is unfair of her to expect you to remain alone for the rest of your life, and you hope she will someday be happy for you if you find love again.

————

Dear Annie: After reading the letter from “Broken” about her husband’s affair with his father’s hospice nurse, my hair is on fire!

I am a licensed clinical social worker by profession and have been CEO of a large regional hospice for 27 years. In hospice, both the patient and family are one unit of care. Professional boundaries are important. This work is emotional and intimate by its nature. But sexual or personal relationships are never appropriate. Patients and families are in a vulnerable position. The supervision of that nurse and her ethical standards are absolutely unacceptable.

”Broken” should ask for the administrator of that hospice program and make a formal complaint. If she does not get a response or resolution, she should make a complaint to the agency in her state that licenses and regulates hospice providers. She would be doing others a favor by not allowing this kind of behavior to continue. Any hospice that allows such a situation to continue unchecked should not be able to care for patients and their families.

— I Am Appalled

————

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Email your questions to [email protected], or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

— Creators Syndicate Inc.

Comments

comments

Special to The Enterprise

  • Recent Posts

  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this newspaper and receive notifications of new articles by email.

  • .

    News

    Suspected Ebola patient being treated at UCD Med Center

    By San Francisco Chronicle | From Page: A1

     
    Town hall focuses on Coordinated Care Initiative

    By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A1

    Parents will get tools to help their children thrive in school

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A1 | Gallery

     
    Need a new best friend?

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A2 | Gallery

     
    Stanford University to get $50 million to produce vaccines

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

    Two more cases of measles in Northern California in children

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

     
    Dartmouth bans hard liquor

    By New York Times News Service | From Page: A2

     
    No bare bottoms, thanks to CommuniCare’s Diaper Drive

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3 | Gallery

    Storyteller relies on nature as his subject on Saturday

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Still time to purchase tickets for DHS Cabaret

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

    All voices welcome at sing-along Wednesday

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Great Chefs Program will feature Mulvaney

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3

    Walkers head out three times weekly

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3Comments are off for this post

     
    Free tax preparation service begins Monday

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3

    Vote for your favorites in Readers’ Choice poll

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    February science fun set at Explorit

    By Lisa Justice | From Page: A6 | Gallery

     
    Take a photo tour of Cuba at Flyway Nights talk

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A6 | Gallery

    See wigeons, curlews and meadowlarks at city wetlands

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A8 | Gallery

     
    .

    Forum

    Time for bed … with Grandma

    By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

     
    Olive expert joins St. James event

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

    We’re grateful for bingo proceeds

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

     
    Tom Meyer cartoon

    By Debbie Davis | From Page: A10

     
    A ‘new deal’ for the WPA building

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A10

    Protect root zone to save trees

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

     
    Weigh quality of life, density

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

    .

    Sports

    UCD has another tough football schedule in 2015

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B1

     
    Gould’s influence felt mightily in recent Super Bowls

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1

    Mustangs hold off UCD women

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    UCD men set new school D-I era win record

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1 | Gallery

    Sharks double up Ducks

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2 | Gallery

     
    Sports briefs: Watney, Woods start slow at TPC Scottsdale

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B2

    Recall that first Aggie TV game, national title?

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B8 | Gallery

     
    .

    Features

    .

    Arts

    ‘Song of the Sea’ is an enchanting fable

    By Derrick Bang | From Page: A11 | Gallery

     
    ‘Artist’s Connection’ launches on DCTV

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A11

     
    Gross’ paintings highlight a slice of Northern California

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A12 | Gallery

    February show at YoloArts’ Gallery 625 is ‘Food for Thought’

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A12 | Gallery

     
    .

    Business

    .

    Obituaries

    .

    Comics

    Comics: Friday, January 30, 2015

    By Creator | From Page: A9