Friday, August 22, 2014
YOLO COUNTY NEWS
99 CENTS

Neighbors fed up with mess

AnniesMailbox

By
May 11, 2011 |

Dear Annie: I live in a small condominium community of 24 units. Two units down, there is an older woman who is a hoarder. She continually has trash piled up by her front door and back porch. When you look through her glass sliding doors, you can see trash from floor to ceiling. She piles up garbage on her car, and it sits there for several days before she takes it to the dumpster. She also has two dogs, and we never see her walking them. This has been going on for the past 15 years.

The board of directors of our condo association has tried everything from calling the county municipal department to notifying animal control. The board has fined her for various misdemeanors, such as not allowing pest control in her unit and leaving all that trash around, but it makes no difference.

The woman does not talk to anyone in the community, and we never see friends or family visit. We are all afraid of what that unit looks like inside. Any suggestions?

— Condo Owner

Dear Owner: Hoarding is a form of mental illness, and this woman likely needs professional help. Since you can see the trash inside her home, as well as outside, it may constitute evidence that her hoarding has created a health code violation and the Dept. of Health could order her to clean it up. There may also be a fire hazard, in which case the condominium board should notify the fire department. As a last resort, the condo board could sue her. Ask the board to discuss this problem with their association attorney to see what steps can be taken.

————

Dear Annie: My wife and I are friends with “Mike” and “Marty,” who are in their early 20s, a bit younger than we are. Mike and Marty pick fights over the most ridiculous things, and even if you make a good point, they won’t agree. They do things they know will bother or offend us, such as when they make anti-religious comments.

They also seem unappreciative of things we have done for them. I helped Mike work on his car and was never thanked for it. We have had them over for dinner more than once and have yet to be told “thank you” or to receive an invite to their place. They sometimes say nice things on Facebook about their other friends, but never about us.

I honestly enjoy hanging out with Mike and Marty, but the little fits they have over ridiculous things are getting old. Lately, we’ve stopped communicating, just to see what will happen. It would be nice to be appreciated for our efforts. How do we handle this?

— Unappreciated in Massachusetts

Dear Massachusetts: You are at a different point in your life than Mike and Marty. What you have in common is no longer so obvious. We are not sure why you wish to maintain a friendship with people who do not seem to appreciate you, but since you do, try to understand their limitations and accept them as they are. And if they say something offensive, by all means, ask them to stop.

————

Dear Annie: You printed a letter I wrote that I signed, “Still Here Doing This.” I told you that I was married to a mentally ill, emotionally abusive man. I stayed for the children, who now rarely visit.

I wanted to let you know that I am not “still here” anymore. I finally mustered the courage to leave when it was apparent that my husband was only getting worse. I had the police remove him from our home, took out a restraining order and filed for divorce. I encourage anyone who is married to such a person to get out. I have no regrets. The emotional and physical abuse needed to end.

— Not There Anymore

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

— Creators Syndicate Inc.

Comments

comments

Special to The Enterprise

  • Recent Posts

  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this newspaper and receive notifications of new articles by email.

  • .

    News

    DHS musicians back from summer in Italy

    By Jeff Hudson | From Page: A1 | Gallery

     
    City to overhaul its sprinkler heads, other water-wasters

    By Dave Ryan | From Page: A1 | Gallery

    No easy task: History buffs still trying to save building

    By Dave Ryan | From Page: A1 | Gallery

     
    Davis indecent-exposure suspect pleads no contest

    By Lauren Keene | From Page: A2

     
    Not-guilty plea entered in Woodland homicide case

    By Lauren Keene | From Page: A2

     
    Russian aid convoy reaches war-torn Luhansk

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

     
    Putah Creek Council appoints new executive director

    By Elizabeth Case | From Page: A3

    Communitywide ice bucket challenge on Sunday

    By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A3

     
    Parents’ Night Out features Vacation Bible School

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Afternoon tours of city wetlands resume Sept. 6

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3 | Gallery

     
    Yolo County golf tournament enters fourth year

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3

    Can you give them a home?

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4 | Gallery

     
    Saylor will meet constituents at Peet’s

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

    Event will unveil mural celebrating food justice

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

     
    Prunes take center stage at last agri-tour of the summer

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

    In need of food? Apply for CalFresh

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

     
    Wolk bill would require reporting of water system leaks

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A5

    Writing couple stops at Davis bookstore

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A5 | Gallery

     
    Explorit: Final Blast show returns for second year

    By Lisa Justice | From Page: A5

    Record drought saps California honey production

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A6

     
    World travelers

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A8

     
    Seniors set to stroll through Arboretum

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A9

    .

    Forum

    Weightlifters causing a racket

    By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

     
    Police are our friends, right?

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

    Wage plan has a big flaw

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

     
    Bridging the digital divide with computational thinking

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A10

     
    Tom Meyer cartoon

    By Debbie Davis | From Page: A10

    No support for militarization

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

     
    A better use for this vehicle

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

    .

    Sports

    Watts likes what he’s seen in keen Aggie DB competition

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    Watney and McIlroy struggle at start of The Barclays

    By Wire and staff reports | From Page: B1

     
    Light-hitting Cats fall

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B1

    Giants win nightcap in Chicago

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    Sports briefs: Big West soccer coaches have high hopes for UCD men

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B8 | Gallery

    .

    Features

    .

    Arts

    Yolo Mambo to play free show

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A11

     
    ‘If I Stay’: Existential angst

    By Derrick Bang | From Page: A11

     
    Davis Chinese Film Festival to kick off with 1994 favorite

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A11

    Rock Band campers perform at E Street Plaza

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A11

     
    Natsoulas to host mural conference

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A11

    .

    Business

    Car Care: Teenagers not driving safe cars, study shows

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A6

     
    Car Care: Feeling the summer heat? Your car battery is too

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A7

    Three-wheeled Elio gets closer to going on sale

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A12 | Gallery

     
    .

    Obituaries

    .

    Comics

    Comics: Friday, August 22, 2014

    By Creator | From Page: B6