Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Should the family shun this guy?


From page A14 | October 06, 2013 |

Dear Annie: My cousin is a police officer in a neighboring city, and we only see him when the whole family is together. Recently, he was caught on camera beating up a woman he’d pulled over for something. From his statement and the camera footage, it seems the woman got mouthy and he responded physically. It was graphic.

We’re all keeping silent on this matter, and fortunately, it hasn’t spread all over the universe on YouTube or anything. But I’m really angry about it. We would never tolerate seeing a man attack a woman on the street. We would not tolerate my cousin hitting his wife. Why do we tolerate him doing this just because he’s a cop?

I’ll hold my tongue for another six months, but that’s it. I really want to suggest to my parents that we stop inviting him to family events, because I don’t want to seem as if I am condoning his behavior. If I were caught beating up a woman on the street, I promise you my relatives would not want me anywhere near their kids. What should I do?

— Angry Cousin

Dear Angry: We assume your cousin’s superiors are aware of the incident and have reprimanded or disciplined him accordingly. Does he have a history of such behavior? If this is the sole instance and he has shown genuine regret, please try to forgive him. This is what family does. If you need to discuss it with him, do so. But it isn’t your place to ban him from family gatherings if the rest of the relatives want him there. Your choice is only to attend or not.


Dear Annie: I am a 24-year-old college student who still lives with my parents. I love them and my two siblings very much, and I know that they love me. However, they are neither understanding nor supportive when anyone makes a mistake. As a result, there is not much I feel I can tell them.

Usually, I can handle my problems by myself, but some things are difficult to handle alone. A few months ago, I suffered a miscarriage. My father once told us that if we ever got pregnant before marriage, we would be disowned. I realize parents often say things to scare some sense into their children, but I know my parents, and they would do it.

I have not told them about the miscarriage, nor do I plan to. I am going through some emotional upheaval: sadness, anger, guilt for not taking enough precautions to prevent the pregnancy and a lot of confusion.

My boyfriend is wonderful, loving and supportive. But I wish more than anything that I could rely on my parents and siblings for support. Here’s a message to all parents, siblings and family members: Please let us know we can come to you for support and caring. Though you might be angry, try not to overreact. When you fail to do this, it can have larger consequences than you realize.

— Grieving

Dear Grieving: Our condolences on your loss. We think most parents would regret knowing their child felt too uncomfortable or fearful to come to them for support, and you might let them know this is the impression they give. There are many support groups specifically for women who miscarry. We recommend SHARE at


Dear Annie: I just read a letter from “Disrespected,” who asked about cellphone etiquette. My complaint is that she called herself a “working mom,” and her friend was a “non-working” mom.

When are people going to stop using these terms? Someone who takes care of kids, cleans, cooks, shops, makes appointments and takes care of endless details morning and night is not “non-working.” Moms who care for their kids and homes work harder than anyone I know, so please, let’s give them the respect they deserve and recognize their hard work.

— All Moms Are Working Moms


Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Email your questions to, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at

— Creators Syndicate Inc.



Special to The Enterprise



Summer jobs aren’t always in the bag

By Spencer Ault | From Page: A1 | Gallery

Davis Arts Center gets a new look, thanks to Brooks

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A1 | Gallery

More details emerge in Woodland officer shootings

By Lauren Keene | From Page: A1 | Gallery

Report details the face of hunger in Yolo County

By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A1 | Gallery

Bob Dunning: Taking on a Specktacular challenge

By Bob Dunning | From Page: A2 | Gallery

For the record

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A2

Students can practice safe bike routes to junior highs

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3

‘Monsters University’ to be screened in Central Park

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

California regulators approve PG&E rate hike

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

America’s ‘it’ school? Look west, Harvard

By New York Times News Service | From Page: B3

School board preps for new academic year

By Jeff Hudson | From Page: A3

The big moveout, on ‘Davisville’

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

Sunder campaign will be at Farmers Market

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

Classic car show slated in Woodland

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

Public opinion sought about Nishi Gateway

By Lily Holmes | From Page: A4

Davis Art Garage honored; bench dedication set

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A8 | Gallery

Woodland historical award winners announced

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A8



Can’t understand this change

By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

Delta-friendly water bond is a win for all of California

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A6

Bravo! The road diet works

By Rich Rifkin | From Page: A6

Support water bond in November

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A6

Relay for Life team says thanks

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A6

Tom Meyer cartoon

By Debbie Davis | From Page: A6



Hard hoops schedule features defending national champs at UCD

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1 | Gallery

Crisp’s big hit helps A’s

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1 | Gallery

Aggie QB is back to pass … Touchdown, Tina! Tina?

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1 | Gallery

Sacramento scores early to snap skid

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B8

Unplayable? Cubs, rain hand Giants a loss

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

UCD roundup: Aggie gymnasts are awesome at academics

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B8 | Gallery



Food that travels well for cooking out

By Julie Cross | From Page: A5 | Gallery



Visit Crawfish and Catfish Festival in Woodland

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

Artists invited to paint at Yolo Bypass Wildlife Area

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A7 | Gallery

Goldberg, Milstein to play at Village Homes

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7 | Gallery

The voice on the CD comes alive at Music Together concert

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

Crowd funding campaign offers support for Art Theater of Davis

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A7





Railroad museum will host Aberbach memorial

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4



Comics: Wednesday, August 20, 2014

By Creator | From Page: B6