Friday, August 29, 2014
YOLO COUNTY NEWS
99 CENTS

Still waiting for the right time

AnniesMailbox

By
From page B5 | November 20, 2012 |

Dear Annie: I am a transgendered boy and am having trouble coming out to my family. I wear sports bras and boy’s clothing most of the time, and when I am speaking with my friends, I use male pronouns, but I still can’t gather the courage to tell my family.

My mother and I once talked about it briefly, but I got nervous and ended up saying it was no big deal. Now I feel as if I’ve missed my chance and will have to wait a long time before I get another shot at it. Being referred to and appearing as a girl makes me genuinely uncomfortable, but I know nothing is going to change until I tell them. Please help.

— Nervous in Vermont

Dear Vermont: Your mother likely suspects what is going on and is simply waiting for you to bring up the subject again. While you’re considering that, please contact PFLAG (pflag.org), an organization that can answer some of your questions and help you discuss the matter with your parents.

————

Dear Annie: I am writing to you because I am so angry. I was unhappy at my job after seven years. The insurance was the only good thing about it.

My friend “Carolyn” had been after me for years to come work with her. She was always saying how much better her job was. The money was good, and the insurance was the same. So I changed jobs. But, Annie, as soon as I went to work there, Carolyn became someone I didn’t know. She is mean, lazy, jealous and never has anything good to say. She spends her workday playing online games, chatting with online friends and taking naps.

It didn’t take long to realize that I had made a huge mistake. When I told Carolyn that I was not learning enough on the job, she said, “I don’t want to overwhelm you.” When I went to others to get more work, she’d get angry and would suddenly find the most trivial tasks to keep me busy.

And the insults never stopped. She said I only got the job because they were looking for people who were neither young nor attractive. (She should know.) She never missed an opportunity to humiliate or belittle me. It only took one week to hate that job and realize the one I left wasn’t so bad, but there was nothing to do but tough it out.

After seven months, I was laid off due to lack of work. I honestly believe I worked myself out of a job. I later found out that I was the third person she has done this to. It is like a sick game she plays. Everyone knew this but me. I am so angry with myself for being so stupid.

I am 56 years old with diabetes, and Carolyn knew how much I needed the insurance. I am amazed at how little help is out there for people like me. I’m trying to forgive, but right now, I can’t.

— Rhonda

Dear Rhonda: You will be able to forgive when you are ready to let go of your anger and resentment toward Carolyn. You could not know that she was untrustworthy. Meanwhile, contact your state’s labor department or governor’s office and find out whether they have employment programs geared toward older women. Also try AARP (aarp.org) and Senior Service America (seniorserviceamerica.org).

————

Dear Annie: Here is another response to “Wondering,” who inquired how to ask about an inheritance.

I wish my parents had spent their money on their dreams. They worked so hard for them. Dad often talks about how much he will be leaving to us “kids.” It makes me sad that he has lived such a frugal life saving for us. I wish he had taken Mom to Europe like she always dreamed. Someday, when my loving parents are gone, I will make that trip to Europe for them.

— Wishing It Was Visa Versa

————

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

— Creators Syndicate Inc.

Comments

comments

Special to The Enterprise

  • Recent Posts

  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this newspaper and receive notifications of new articles by email.

  • .

    News

    Davis Innovation Center team fields questions

    By Dave Ryan | From Page: A1 | Gallery

     
    Saving Putah Creek: a quiet concert at sunset

    By Elizabeth Case | From Page: A1 | Gallery

    Mr. Dolcini goes to Washington

    By Tanya Perez | From Page: A1 | Gallery

     
    Winton to be feted for her many years of community work

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: A1 | Gallery

    Researchers solve mystery of Death Valley’s moving rocks

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2 | Gallery

     
    California extends review of $25B delta plan

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

     
    Assembly approves statewide ban on plastic bags

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

    Equestrian eventing competition slated

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Dinner, auction benefit Yolo County CASA

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

    Forum explores local mental health services

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Solar-cooking workshop set at Food Co-op

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

    Celebrate the Senior Center at Sept. 9 luncheon

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

     
    Need a new best friend?

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3 | Gallery

    Kids can sign up for a library card and get a free book

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

     
    Explorit Science Center: Volunteers supercharge summer camp

    By Lisa Justice | From Page: A4 | Gallery

    Tee off for Davis’ continued prosperity

    By Lily Holmes | From Page: A4

     
     
    Bodega Marine Laboratory hosts open house

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A5 | Gallery

    Local group charts a year’s worth of beauty in flowers

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A5

     
    Free blood pressure screenings offered

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A5

    Name Droppers: UCD honors two of its own

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A6

     
    Books, conversation and poetry at Logos

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

     
    .

    Forum

    Let’s sell the MRAP on eBay

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: C2

     
    Seeing both sides of ‘tank’

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: C2

    What if we need MRAP?

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: C2

     
    How could tank be helpful?

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: C2

     
    Tom Meyer cartoon

    By Debbie Davis | From Page: C2

    Don’t sentence our police to death

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: C2, 1 Comment

     
    Will Davis see river water?

    By Letters to the Editor | From Page: C2

    Travel buddy is getting too fat

    By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

     
    .

    Sports

    UCD-Stanford: the clock is down to counting the minutes

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1

     
    Forget the score; focus on the energy brought by Aggies

    By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1

    Returning seniors, new faces lead promising DHS links squad

    By Evan Ream | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    Devil golfers return from Scotland with smiles on their faces

    By Evan Ream | From Page: B1 | Gallery

    Devils scrimmage with Sac

    By Wayne Tilcock | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    Sports briefs: DHS girls fall by the slimmest of net margins

    By Enterprise staff | From Page: B6 | Gallery

    Wire briefs: Aces cruise past Cats at Raley

    By Wire and staff reports | From Page: B6

     
    .

    Features

    .

    Arts

    ‘The November Man’: Who can be trusted?

    By Derrick Bang | From Page: A9 | Gallery

     
    B Street’s ‘The Ladies Foursome’ is aces

    By Bev Sykes | From Page: A9 | Gallery

    .

    Business

    Technology makes a great car better

    By Ali Arsham | From Page: C1 | Gallery

     
    .

    Obituaries

    Margarita Elizondo

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

     
    Elaine Dracia Greenberg

    By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

    .

    Comics