Friday, January 30, 2015
YOLO COUNTY NEWS
99 CENTS

Today on ‘Overreaction Theater’ …

AnniesMailbox

By
From page A10 | April 06, 2014 |

Dear Annie: I am a recently divorced and remarried 46-year-old male. I was always very close to my sister, but these past few years, she only thinks of herself.

My mother passed away a year ago, and my sister handled her memorial service. I was extremely grateful to her because I was a wreck. However, on a bulletin board outside of the chapel, my sister posted several photographs, including wedding pictures from my first marriage. I didn’t understand why — Mom wasn’t in any of these photographs. At the time, I was separated from my ex-wife and going through a divorce. My then-fiancee attended the service with me, and it was humiliating and hurtful.

A week later, I called my sister and explained how upsetting it was for us to see those photographs. My sister told me to “grow up.” After that phone conversation, I cut off all contact with her.

For some unknown reason, my sister doesn’t like my new wife. Did I handle it appropriately by cutting off all contact with her?

— C.J.

Dear C.J.: We understand that you are angry with your sister, and we agree that those photographs had no place at the memorial service. Nonetheless, your decision to cut off all contact was extreme. Divorced couples often don’t realize that parents and siblings might also grieve the end of their relationship. Instead of repairing the problem, you burned the bridge.

If you want to reconnect with your sister, you will need to reach out to her gently. Don’t rehash the memorial service. Simply say that you miss her, that you feel hurt when she rejects your wife, and that you hope they will get along better someday. Ask how to improve things. We hope she will be equally willing.

————

Dear Annie: My wife and I have the best neighbors anyone could ever have. They shovel snow off of my steps, clean off my car, bring up the morning paper and numerous other things.

We have given them gifts as a way to say “thank you,” but I’m afraid if we continue with that practice, they will feel obligated to keep doing things for us, and we certainly don’t intend that. Any suggestions?

— Stumped

Dear Stumped: Your neighbors understand that the gifts are a way to thank them, and if they are encouraged to continue, so be it. They would probably keep doing these things regardless. We suggest you invite them for a casual meal — perhaps a backyard barbecue when the weather warms up. You also could offer to return the favor any time they travel or otherwise need assistance. And be sure to tell them in person that you think they are the best neighbors in the world. They will appreciate that.

————

Dear Annie: You printed several responses to the essay “Dead at Seven” about older drivers. I thought you and your readers might be interested to know that a study of senior drivers is being conducted in Canada. It is the Canadian Driving Research Initiative for Vehicular Safety in the Elderly (CANDRIVE), dedicated to improving the safety of older drivers. Volunteers (which I am) are evaluated mentally and physically at least once a year.

One of the goals is to extend the length of time that older drivers can safely drive through retraining programs and customized or restricted licensing. CANDRIVE is also working to develop a screening tool to identify unsafe older drivers. Early identification will protect the public, as well as the rights of the majority of older drivers who are still capable.

As a final evaluation, I am being asked to drive to two of my regular sites. I will have cameras installed in my car and will be followed by another car that will observe my reactions. Those interested can check candrive.ca.

— P.J., age 83, No Tickets, No Accidents (Knock Wood)

————

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Email your questions to [email protected], or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

— Creators Syndicate Inc.

Comments

comments

Creators Syndicate

.

News

Suspected Ebola patient being treated at UCD Med Center

By San Francisco Chronicle | From Page: A1

 
Town hall focuses on Coordinated Care Initiative

By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A1

Schools give parents tools to help kids thrive

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A1 | Gallery

 
Need a new best friend?

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A2 | Gallery

 
Stanford University to get $50 million to produce vaccines

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

Two more cases of measles in Northern California in children

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

 
Dartmouth bans hard liquor

By New York Times News Service | From Page: A2

 
All voices welcome at sing-along Wednesday

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

Great Chefs Program will feature Mulvaney

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3

 
Free tax preparation service begins Monday

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3

Walkers head out three times weekly

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3Comments are off for this post

 
No bare bottoms, thanks to CommuniCare’s Diaper Drive

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3 | Gallery

Storyteller relies on nature as his subject on Saturday

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
Still time to purchase tickets for DHS Cabaret

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
February science fun set at Explorit

By Lisa Justice | From Page: A6 | Gallery

Take a photo tour of Cuba at Flyway Nights talk

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A6 | Gallery

 
See wigeons, curlews and meadowlarks at city wetlands

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A8 | Gallery

.

Forum

Time for bed … with Grandma

By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

 
We’re grateful for bingo proceeds

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

Tom Meyer cartoon

By Debbie Davis | From Page: A10

 
A ‘new deal’ for the WPA building

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A10

 
Protect root zone to save trees

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

Weigh quality of life, density

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

 
Olive expert joins St. James event

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

.

Sports

UCD has another tough football schedule in 2015

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B1

 
Gould’s influence felt mightily in recent Super Bowls

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1

Mustangs hold off UCD women

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B1 | Gallery

 
UCD men set new school D-I era win record

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1 | Gallery

Sharks double up Ducks

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2 | Gallery

 
Sports briefs: Watney, Woods start slow at TPC Scottsdale

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B2

Recall that first Aggie TV game, national title?

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B8 | Gallery

 
.

Features

.

Arts

‘Song of the Sea’ is an enchanting fable

By Derrick Bang | From Page: A11 | Gallery

 
‘Artist’s Connection’ launches on DCTV

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A11

 
Gross’ paintings highlight a slice of Northern California

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A12 | Gallery

February show at YoloArts’ Gallery 625 is ‘Food for Thought’

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A12 | Gallery

 
.

Business

.

Obituaries

.

Comics

Comics: Friday, January 30, 2015

By Creator | From Page: A9