Tuesday, October 21, 2014
YOLO COUNTY NEWS
99 CENTS

Troubled daughter slips away

AnniesMailbox

Dear Annie: My 17-year-old daughter, “Kylie,” has had behavioral problems since she was 14. I am a single mother. I work full time and also have two sons, one of whom lives with his dad. Kylie was in a hospital for three months for various evaluations and recently lived in a residential home.

She was released last October on the condition that she follow the house rules, obey curfew, finish high school, get a job and start looking at colleges. But Kylie never followed the rules. She would go out on Friday night and not return until Sunday morning. Every time she broke parole conditions, it would be reported. During this time, we had family counseling, and an individual clinician saw Kylie. They offered help with resumes, job applications and social activities.

In December, Kylie met a 24-year-old man and ran off with him. This young man was discharged from the military because of psychiatric issues. This scares me to no end. Kylie is now considered a missing person, although she’s been in contact via text, telling me to leave her alone. There is a warrant out to take them into custody. Since then, my home has been robbed of clothing, food and jewelry. I am sick over this.

Kylie will be 18 in two weeks. She has no remorse for what she’s done. People tell me to let her go, but how? I am angry, but I still love her. I am losing sleep, I’m scared in my own home, my 10-year-old can’t sleep alone, my work is suffering, and I’m a mess. I’ve talked to the police and am doing my own detective work to find her. I need help.

— Worried Sick in Connecticut

Dear Connecticut: You are living every parent’s nightmare. We don’t expect you to stop loving Kylie, but you have another child who needs your protection now. For your own safety and that of your son, it’s time to let Kylie manage her own life, good or bad, sink or swim. If you can send her a text message, let her know you love her and wish her well, but she’s on her own. If she is using house keys to steal from you, change your locks. Report any break-ins to the police. And please get some emotional support for yourself at Because I Love You (bily.org).

————

Dear Annie: I have relatives who cannot discuss certain topics without flying into a rage. I usually try not to engage, but it still hurts when they attack my beliefs and opinions.

How do I get them to calm down? I sometimes think it would be better if I cut them off completely. Your advice?

— Minnesota

Dear Minnesota: If these are distant relatives, we recommend you avoid them as much as possible. If you are forced to be in their company, do not converse with them beyond superficial pleasantries. You are not obligated to respond to every question asked of you, and it would help if you didn’t take their comments so personally. People who cannot control themselves while socializing have anger management issues. If things get out of hand, say goodbye and walk out the door.

————

Dear Annie: You were too nice to “Washington,” who had borrowed money from her in-laws to help pay for her two daughters’ weddings and then borrowed more when her husband lost his job. She didn’t tell the brides because she wanted them to glory in their wedding days without any stress. Then she was upset when her in-laws did not send Christmas gifts to the daughters.

”Washington” sounds as though she has a huge sense of entitlement, which she also seems to be fostering in her daughters. I would have told her to grow up and stop borrowing money for things like weddings.

— Wisconsin

————

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

— Creators Syndicate Inc.

Comments

comments

Special to The Enterprise

.

News

Winters homicide case enters jury-selection phase

By Lauren Keene | From Page: A1

 
So much more than a cute baby store

By Bob Schultz | From Page: A1 | Gallery

 
Suspected arson fires concern neighbors, firefighters

By Lauren Keene | From Page: A1 | Gallery

 
Apply now for community mediation training

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

Paws for Thought: Pets for Vets: matches made in heaven

By Evelyn Dale | From Page: A3 | Gallery

 
‘Tokyo Kill’ author will visit bookstore

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3

DPNS has play group, preschool openings

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
Sierra Club gathers for morning walks

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A3

Yolo Knitters Guild plans fall meetings

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
Local farm products found at hospital market

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

Tax tips offered for sole proprietors

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
First-time home buyers get free advice

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

Psychiatric clinic hosts open house

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

 
Beer dinner set on Co-op patio

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

Walkin’ the Dawg through the park

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4 | Gallery

 
 
Essay contest winners will be honored Tuesday

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

Library hosts after-hours teen movie nights

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

 
Volunteers sought to make veggie bags

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

Forum eyes impacts of raising the local minimum wage

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A5

 
NAMI-Yolo family support group meets Sunday

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

To save the birds, look to the fish

By Kat Kerlin | From Page: A7 | Gallery

 
Birding field trip planned Saturday

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A12 | Gallery

.

Forum

Ready to go, whatever happens

By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

 
Where there’s a will …

By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

Sunder has bold vision

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A8

 
Archer, Nolan are my picks

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A8

She’s innovative, passionate

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A8

 
An accidental fan becomes a baseball devotee

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A8

U.N. steps up to lead Ebola response

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A8

 
John Cole cartoon

By Debbie Davis | From Page: A8

These three are the best

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A8

 
.

Sports

Villegas wonderstrike powers Devils

By Evan Ream | From Page: B1 | Gallery

 
DHS golfers take the title

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B1

Devil defense regresses in football loss

By Thomas Oide | From Page: B1

 
UCD’s Wegener is the engine that drives the train

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B1 | Gallery

Sports briefs: Top-end tennis talent helps DHS girls grab a win

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B2 | Gallery

 
Junior Blue Devils: Regular slate ends with 2 Davis teams playoff bound

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B3 | Gallery

After running the gridiron gauntlet, can UCD regroup?

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B8 | Gallery

 
.

Features

.

Arts

 
Stories on Stage Davis presents tales by Lescroart, Montieth

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A11 | Gallery

 
.

Business

.

Obituaries

Peggy Belenis Swisher

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

 
.

Comics

Comics: Tuesday, October 21, 2014 (set 1)

By Creator | From Page: B5

 
Comics: Tuesday, October 21, 2014 (set 2)

By Creator | From Page: B7