Sunday, September 21, 2014
YOLO COUNTY NEWS
99 CENTS

Will Dad’s other kids mind?

AnniesMailbox

Dear Annie: I recently decided to do a little digging into my past and started a family tree. While I was doing this, I came across information that my biological father had passed away some 10 years ago.

Annie, I had no contact with my biological father after the age of 2. He had an affair with my mother and then went back to his wife. I don’t even know what he looked like. In all honesty, I have no feelings about his passing. I have never regretted not meeting him.

The reason I am writing is that he had two children by the woman he was married to while seeing my mother on the side. I doubt they even know that my two younger brothers and I exist, especially since he went out of his way to deny having fathered us in the first place.

My mother suggested I contact these now-grown children and let them know about us. I do not think this is a good idea and prefer to leave well enough alone. Your thoughts?

– Curious in Minnesota

Dear Curious: We agree with you to leave things alone. We assume you have relevant medical information about your biological father. Does your mother have a photograph of him so you can satisfy any curiosity you have about what he looked like? These children may deeply resent learning that their father had an affair that produced siblings, and developing a relationship with you could be too painful for them. If they do know about you, they can do the same search you are considering, so we’d let them make that decision.

————

Dear Annie: My wife reads the paper daily, so I’m hoping you can get through to her. She has put on more than 100 pounds since our two kids were born.

I would like to tell her I love her and worry about her health. We talk about growing old together and all the things we will get to experience with our children. They are now at a great age to travel, and we can enjoy their sporting events. My wife exercises a little but cannot refuse a cookie, brownie or piece of cake. I try to lead by example by exercising regularly, eating no goodies and keeping watch over my health. I want us to take long walks and grow old together.

Thank you for printing this. If I said these words to my wife, she would take it badly, but when she reads it, I will tell her I wrote it.

— Omaha, Neb.

Dear Omaha: How could any woman be upset when her husband says he wants to grow old with her? Weight is a tricky issue and a do-it-yourself project. And 100 pounds might seem overwhelming. If you indicate disapproval of her food choices, it makes her feel terrible, which only makes her want to eat. Your wife is aware of her weight and undoubtedly wants to drop some pounds.

Could you take over more of the cooking and grocery shopping so there are healthier meals and snacks? Would she take a romantic walk with you after dinner? Would she join Weight Watchers or Overeaters Anonymous? Would she download an app on her phone to keep track of her calories and exercise?

When you show her this letter, ask how you can help her. We hope she will work on it, but if she refuses, please know there is nothing more you can do. Love her as is.

————

Dear Annie: “Concerned in Galesburg, Ill.” disapproved of parents taking photographs of their babies without clothing on. We once had an attorney general who went around putting diapers on statues of naked people. I’ve often wondered who his constituents were.

— Babies Are Adorable

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

Comments

comments

Special to The Enterprise

.

News

Elementary school counselors: necessary, but poorly funded

By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A1 | Gallery

 
 
Bet Haverim hosts High Holy Day services

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A1

 
Teams assess damage as wildfire burns

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2 | Gallery

 
Driver arrested for DUI after Saturday morning crash

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A2

Help raise funds for juvenile diabetes cure

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
Jewelry, art for sale at Senior Center

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

Davis Community Meals needs cooks

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
Da Vinci awarded $38,000 for restorative justice program

By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A4

 
Hawk Hill trip planned Sept. 30

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

UC campus chancellors granted hefty pay raises

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

 
Send kids to camp!

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

Outdoor yoga marathon celebrates community

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A5

 
Wise words

By Sue Cockrell | From Page: A12

 
.

Forum

Awareness is key to this fight

By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

 
Where is this going?

By Creators Syndicate | From Page: A6

We’re living in the Golden State of emergency

By Debra DeAngelo | From Page: A6

 
Options for protection come with flu season

By The Associated Press | From Page: A6

Are we there yet? Not enough hours in the day to goof off

By Tanya Perez | From Page: A6Comments are off for this post

 
Don’t sell city greenbelt

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

Paso Fino project is flawed

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

 
Paso Fino — it’s not worth it

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

Archer will get my vote

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

 
It’s time for Davis Scouts to stand up for what is right

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A10

Mike Keefe cartoon

By Debbie Davis | From Page: A10

 
Building something at schools’ HQ

By Our View | From Page: A10

Speak out

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A11

 
Maybe David can beat Goliath again

By Lynne Nittler | From Page: A11 | Gallery

.

Sports

DHS gets on its Morse to beat Edison

By Thomas Oide | From Page: B1 | Gallery

 
JV Blue Devils drop low-scoring affair

By Spencer Ault | From Page: B2

 
Republic FC’s fairy tale season continues

By Evan Ream | From Page: B3 | Gallery

Wire briefs: Giants rally falls short in San Diego

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

 
Four local swimmers qualify for Olympic Trials

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B3

‘We’re a way better team’ than record, says UCD’s Shaffer

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B4 | Gallery

 
UCD roundup: Aggie men pound Pomona-Pitzer in the pool

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B4

Davis 15-year-old making a splash in European F4 series

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B8 | Gallery

 
.

Features

.

Arts

‘Ladies Foursome’ adds shows

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
.

Business

MBI hires VP of marketing

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

 
UCD grad’s startup earns kudos at TechCrunch event

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A7

Styles on target for November debut

By Wendy Weitzel | From Page: A7

 
Taylor Morrison unveils new Woodland community next weekend

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A9 | Gallery

Rob White: What is an ‘innovation center’?

By Rob White | From Page: A9

 
.

Obituaries

Carol L. Walsh

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

 
.

Comics

Comics: Sunday, September 21, 2014

By Creator | From Page: B8