Bob Dunning: Plenty of space for all views in this paper

FAIR AND BALANCED? … no, The Enterprise isn’t Fox News, thank heavens, but I do get tired of the handful of folks who continue to bellyache that the only opinions allowed into this hallowed gazette are those of the Above-Pictured Columnist … nothing could be further from the truth … just last Sunday, we ran two — yes, two — op-eds in favor of Measure I, plus a long and thoughtful editorial endorsing Measure I, plus one op-ed opposing Measure I … throughout this long and divisive campaign, we have run multiple op-eds on both sides of the subject … not to mention dozens and dozens of letters to the editor that run the gamut … the charge of bias or lack of accessibility lacks any substance … those making it should cease and desist or move to Dixon …

SPEAKING OF OP-EDS … the esteemed treasurer of the Yes on I committee, a chap named Alan, penned one of the aforementioned op-eds (see above) that dissolved into a comical personal attack on this paper’s Page 2 columnist … instead of trying to convince us why we should cast our votes in favor of the surface water project, Alan concludes by saying “Bob Dunning” should stick to berating “the Natural Resources Commission for daring to restrict his beloved plastic bags and his god-given right to use his smelly wood-burning fireplace any time he chooses.” …

What plastic bags or smelly fireplaces have to do with Sacramento River water, I don’t know, but it does raise a few questions for me … Alan seems to know an awful lot about my fireplace for someone who has never been invited into our living room … I’m thinking maybe I’d better call Chief Landy Black and have him dust the neighborhood for fingerprints to see who has or hasn’t been lurking outside our humble home in a futile search for smoke … now, we do have a chimney, as almost all tract houses built in 1951 do, but many folks in our neighborhood long ago converted their fireplaces to something else while leaving the chimney intact and sticking out the roof like a giant Tootsie Roll …

In addition to a chimney, I’ll also admit to keeping a stack of freshly cut firewood on the front porch, mostly for its Norman Rockwell ambiance, but partly to confuse folks like Alan should they come snooping around the neighborhood … in any regard, I would never, ever consider burning anything not allowed to be burned on any day where burning is restricted in our fair city … except maybe for a puff or two of white smoke on the day a new pope is chosen …

As for plastic bags, the NRC convinced me long ago to do all my shopping at that wonderful nearby grocery that offers neither paper nor plastic …

EVEN MORE ODD-EDS … the one thing we did learn about water from Alan’s wordy op-ed is that Davis’ deep well water “is, in fact, very good quality water” that Alan would be “perfectly happy to get year round” if that could be accomplished … which is exactly what I was saying last week when I wrote that our deep well water was “pure as the driven snow” … this came after I met with the mayor, who also assured me of its very high quality … at last, something we can all agree on … there is absolutely nothing wrong with Davis’ deep well water … it’s even good for cleaning smelly fireplaces …

WELL, WELL, WELL … yesterday’s reported problem with one of the city’s deep wells makes me wonder what “Alan” (see above) would say about its “very good quality” now … the timing of the problem has tongues wagging on both sides of the aisle … some on the “no” side see a conspiracy in a Davis well going down a week before Election Day, while some on the “yes” side are crowing “told you so,” about our lousy well water …

For me, the conspiracy theory doesn’t hold much water, given that this water quality revelation comes late in the campaign after many Davisites have already voted … nevertheless, our friend Alan (see above), having just assured us of the “very good quality” of Davis well water, appears to be caught between a rock and a deep aquifer on this one …

POLLING FOR DOLLARS … much is being made of Yes on I guru Will Arnold’s unwillingness to release the results of the most recent poll his organization paid for, but it could be all smoke and mirrors … or maybe someone’s just playing games with us … while Yes on I did cartwheels to the microphone to release its first poll long ago when it showed that only 11 percent of Davisites opposed the surface water project, it is reluctant to do so now … this has everyone wondering what the latest numbers are, but maybe the Yes on I folks are just playing things close to the vest … hey, they paid for the poll and they can use it — or not use it — any way they wish … if they don’t want to release the numbers, that’s their right …

I will say the smartest thing Yes on I has done is to hire native son Will Arnold to run this campaign … a local boy who is as honest as the day is long … still, Will isn’t the one pulling strings on whether to release the poll … that decision is being made by higher-ups, with Will simply delivering the news to the unwashed masses … it doesn’t really matter what the poll says anyway … we’ll all know soon enough …

— Reach Bob Dunning at bdunning@davisenterprise.net