Sunday, September 21, 2014
YOLO COUNTY NEWS
99 CENTS

Bob Dunning: There’s money in those boulevards

BobDunning2W

By
From page A2 | January 26, 2014 |

Under the category of “great minds think alike,” my friend Jeff emailed me with a brilliant idea at the very moment the exact same idea was forming in my brain.

Jeff took note of a recent column concerning the naming of streets in the old hometown in which I suggested choosing new streets names by simply flipping through the local phone book.

“Congratulations, Mr. Crumbocker, as a result of a random drawing held at City Hall, a new street in Cannery Park will be named Crumbocker Court in your honor,” will read the memo from the city attorney. “As long as you don’t commit a felony, file for bankruptcy or move to Woodland during the remainder of your natural life, the street will remain Crumbocker Court.”

As brilliant as that idea is, as Jeff points out, it does nothing to raise some sorely needed revenue for this town.

Writes Jeff: “As city leaders ponder the addition of yet another parcel tax to help rectify the so-called ‘structural deficit’ (a euphemistic term for authorizing expenditures exceeding income), perhaps they should adopt a tactic from capital campaign fundraisers and sports team owners. Fundraising campaigns generate large amounts of cash by selling ‘naming opportunities’ and ‘sponsorships.’ “

Indeed, indeed, indeed. I remember after attending a football game on the Oregon State University campus in Corvallis, I strolled through a nearby courtyard where some alums were gathering and even the flower pots had name plates that had clearly gone to the highest bidder. And the very same “Parker Stadium” where I had attended football games as a student was now named after some potato salad outfit in Portland.

Anyone who watched the recent orgy of college football bowl games knows firsthand about naming rights.

We used to have the Rose Bowl, the Orange Bowl, the Sugar Bowl and the Cotton Bowl. We now have the Vizio Rose Bowl, the Discover Orange Bowl, the Allstate Sugar Bowl and the AT&T Cotton Bowl.

Not to mention the Beef ‘O’ Brady’s Bowl, the Buffalo Wild Wings Bowl, the Outback Bowl, the Little Caesars Bowl, the Chick-fil-A Bowl and my all-time favorite, the Famous Idaho Potato Bowl.

With a calorie-laden lineup like that, it’s a wonder they still bother to play the Fight Hunger Bowl.

Adds Jeff: “Naming rights for stadiums, arenas, auditoriums, meeting rooms, lobbies, walkways, courtyards and other public areas equate to revenue.”

What the heck, let’s sell everything. I mean, I don’t care if they rename Hunt Way as Woodstock’s Way if it means we’ll be able to pave our sidewalks in gold or at least pay our firefighters in cash.

“For every new street in our town, more than enough local citizens would be willing to write a fat check for the privilege of perpetuating their name on a local street, or dedicating a street to a family member or respected friend.”

Just think, Woodland has the very cool “Dead Cat Alley,” but now we can have the even cooler “Fat Cat Alley.”

“Streets could have varying pricing tiers: naming rights for a cul-de-sac would cost five figures, a neighborhood through street would go for six figures, and a high-volume arterial would command seven figures.”

Yeah, except on my side of the tracks we call a cul-de-sac a “dead end,” since there’s no way out except the way you came in. How much for naming rights to the Dunning Dead End?

“When the sponsored street sign is mounted on a pole, the city would present the donor with a framed replica of the sign.”

Imagine, a pole on Pole Line bearing the family name.

“Even the California Department of Motor Vehicles has taken advantage of the cash-generation opportunities of selling ‘vanity plates.’ The city of Davis is at the tail end of this parade, but it’s not too late to hop on.”

I can see it now. Davis Ace Avenue, Steve’s Place Place, McDonald’s Manor, KFC Court, Coldwell Banker Boulevard, Target Terrace and the Historic Hibbert Highway.

Step right up, ladies and gentlemen, the bidding starts now.

— Reach Bob Dunning at bdunning@davisenterprise.net

Comments

comments

.

News

 
Bet Haverim hosts High Holy Day services

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A1

Elementary school counselors: necessary, but poorly funded

By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A1 | Gallery

 
Teams assess damage as wildfire burns

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2 | Gallery

 
Driver arrested for DUI after Saturday morning crash

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A2

 
Jewelry, art for sale at Senior Center

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
Davis Community Meals needs cooks

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
Help raise funds for juvenile diabetes cure

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

Da Vinci awarded $38,000 for restorative justice program

By Anne Ternus-Bellamy | From Page: A4

 
Hawk Hill trip planned Sept. 30

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

UC campus chancellors granted hefty pay raises

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

 
Send kids to camp!

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A4

Outdoor yoga marathon celebrates community

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A5

 
Wise words

By Sue Cockrell | From Page: A12

 
.

Forum

Awareness is key to this fight

By Creators Syndicate | From Page: B5

 
Are we there yet? Not enough hours in the day to goof off

By Tanya Perez | From Page: A6Comments are off for this post

Where is this going?

By Creators Syndicate | From Page: A6

 
We’re living in the Golden State of emergency

By Debra DeAngelo | From Page: A6

Options for protection come with flu season

By The Associated Press | From Page: A6

 
It’s time for Davis Scouts to stand up for what is right

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A10

Mike Keefe cartoon

By Debbie Davis | From Page: A10

 
Building something at schools’ HQ

By Our View | From Page: A10

Don’t sell city greenbelt

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

 
Paso Fino project is flawed

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

Paso Fino — it’s not worth it

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

 
Archer will get my vote

By Letters to the Editor | From Page: A10

Maybe David can beat Goliath again

By Lynne Nittler | From Page: A11 | Gallery

 
Speak out

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A11

.

Sports

DHS gets on its Morse to beat Edison

By Thomas Oide | From Page: B1 | Gallery

 
JV Blue Devils drop low-scoring affair

By Spencer Ault | From Page: B2

 
Four local swimmers qualify for Olympic Trials

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B3

Republic FC’s fairy tale season continues

By Evan Ream | From Page: B3 | Gallery

 
Wire briefs: Giants rally falls short in San Diego

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

‘We’re a way better team’ than record, says UCD’s Shaffer

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B4 | Gallery

 
UCD roundup: Aggie men pound Pomona-Pitzer in the pool

By Enterprise staff | From Page: B4

Davis 15-year-old making a splash in European F4 series

By Bruce Gallaudet | From Page: B8 | Gallery

 
.

Features

.

Arts

‘Ladies Foursome’ adds shows

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A3

 
.

Business

UCD grad’s startup earns kudos at TechCrunch event

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A7

 
Styles on target for November debut

By Wendy Weitzel | From Page: A7

MBI hires VP of marketing

By Enterprise staff | From Page: A7

 
Taylor Morrison unveils new Woodland community next weekend

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A9 | Gallery

Rob White: What is an ‘innovation center’?

By Rob White | From Page: A9

 
.

Obituaries

Carol L. Walsh

By Special to The Enterprise | From Page: A4

 
.

Comics

Comics: Sunday, September 21, 2014

By Creator | From Page: B8